Mom Army

I think I am one of the most fortunate Moms out there!  Among at least 183 other moms that is!

I have to say one of the things I am most thankful for is Facebook, and only because, while it's difficult to get out to socialize and there aren't any mom and me groups around here, I am able to have my own little mom and me group on the social network. 

Back when Tony and I decided it was time to start "trying" I started charting my cycles, discovered there were problems and started seeing the doctor.  A few months after that I joined a charting site (Fertility Friend; here forward referred to as FF) and discovered they offered forums and a chat room.  I never attended the forums but found comfort and company in the chat rooms; often spending HOURS at a time chatting with some of the most amazing women ever.  


During the "TTC" (Trying to Conceive) phase I spent so much time on FF I got to know some ladies particularly well:   The ones that were first and most fond in my early FF memories are Kirsie123, Shan, Fingers, Zee, Ninja, Poz, Kimmy, LadySprat, Aqua, Amerch, HollyPreemieMom, Jan; then later CJ, CheeseheadinPA, Lobs, Jules, susiewombat, Silver, Cat, MSK, Dani, Val, Ayla, HeyHey, SamFeilds and more!   I could go on and hope none of my special mom friends feel left out!

So, I spent hours talking to these women, pouring out my heart and deepest thoughts, wishes dreams and fears; and 'listened' while each did the same; forming bonds that will forever be strong and deeply cherished in my heart.

Most of my FFs have been successful in their journey, but there are still several who have not; my heart still hopes with all my being and my fingers are always crossed for them - always. 

While I was pregnant with the triplets, I experienced depression and separated myself from these ladies mostly, only staying in contact throughout with a few.  Some it was because it always seemed like a mompetetion of who felt what and who knew more, a competition I had no interest in participating in.  Others, I had to cut off to break old habits, and some because I felt immense guilt that here I was with 3 babies and they had none.  I will NEVER forget my journey as so many do, I do not take my children for granted.   The moms I did keep in close contact with, Nic, Kim and Holly (And when I say close contact, I mean we spoke often, almost daily); in teh case of Holly, we spoke every day, several times a day; and I really would have been lost without her guidance.  Her pregnancy ended in Tragedy with the early delivery and passing of her sweet baby Delanie Faye, and I have never wept so hard and felt so deeply for a friend as I did for Holly that day. 

These women have stolen my heart, and though I have only met 4 of them in person, I feel like I know each and every one of them as fully as if they were my neighbour. 

After the delivery of the boys I became an active member of the forums on FF and did not frequent the chat rooms, I no longer knew the people frequenting the chat rooms and it was if it was time to move on; besides, the time I used to spend on chatting, was now spent loving on Vi and my sweet baby boys.      I did feel a deep loss of this social event; sinking a little more deep into the lack-of-social-encounters funk I had found myself.   But the more I frequented the forums the more I felt like part of a group again.  I joined the Moms of Multiples group, and became fb friends with them, which led me to "triplet mommies' group on fb, another wonderful source of information, but I don't feel connected to those women.

It was becoming active in my May Due group on FF that saved me, I was absent during most of my pregnancy, but started participating more and more after the birth of the boys. A wonderful source of information in those early days...  The older the boys got though the more I felt there was a gap, it seemed the boys were significantly older than some of the babies so milestones etc were on a different stage.  I still love these women, sharing every part of my life with them and feel like these are my best friends; but felt that I wasn't able to contribute on the same scale and was on a different page with development at certain times.  The older they get the smaller the gap gets again, interestingly.    Anyway, during that time frame I was looking for information and came across the April ladies group on FF, after requesting to join their group I really feel like I just 'fit in' like I had been there all along.  They welocmed me with open arms, and open minds. 

Between my May Mommies and April Mommies groups on FB, and my close Chat friends that I am still in touch with, I feel like my life has been so enriched. I have learned from these ladies, so many things; not just about my babies, but about myself, about other cultures, different views, trials and tribulations.  I've laughed and cried, vented and listened. 

While I cherish my real life friends; they are not replaced, these women are in addition to, and who could ask for more?   I am really looking forward to all the coming years with my newest and closest friends, talking to them every day, maybe meeting some of them in person in the future.

I have 'friends' all over the world, and I KNOW we would band together for anything, I have witnessed this, the support and understanding is amazing.   I have come to refer to you as an Army of Moms.

So, to my Mom army... All 183+ of you.  Thank you.  I love you all!